Personal Development

I Want to be a Stay-at-Home Mom Again! | My Plan

I’ve been an aircraft mechanic for about 15 months, and I am absolutely miserable.  After eight years of being a content homemaker, I only allowed myself to be “coerced” into the workforce because we’re following Dave Ramsey’s 7 Baby Steps to Financial Peace, and I realized that we needed that extra income to be successful, especially at quick debt elimination.

Now that we’re debt-free (as of August 2019), have received pay raises, and are saving a 3-month emergency fund of at least $10,000, I want to be a homemaker again.  But, I am struggling to convince my husband, and I want his approval.

He’s afraid that if I quit, we won’t be able to save enough for an early retirement, or buy a house or income properties.  That, and he’s not content as an aircraft mechanic, either.  So, why should I be happy if he’s not?  But, I know what I want, and I want to be a homemaker.  (That, and a landlady who manages her own properties with my husband by the time I’m 40 in eleven years.)

However, before I quit, I want to be able to set us up for financial success and to where I don’t have to feel pressured to earn an income if I don’t want to.  (But, I probably will because of my entrepreneurial drive.)  So, I need to convince my husband with a plan of action, because talking about it so far has gotten me nowhere.

But first, why do I want to be a homemaker?

  • I was content and fulfilled as a homemaker.  I loved managing our household without the added stress of work.
  • I have to balance everything on my shoulders – work, a husband, three young children, and managing our home (chores, etc.) – and the weight is crippling.  My husband does help sometimes, and I appreciate it when he does, but he’s not consistent.
  • It’s imperative for me to have quality time with my family.  My current work schedule rarely allows for this.  There’s no time to do anything but work, eat, and sleep during the work week.  During the weekends, I’m focused on chores or trying to relax because I’m too exhausted to do anything else that we want to do.
  • I won’t have to work for anyone but myself and family.  I’ve always been entrepreneurial and know that I can make money, if necessary, doing something that I’ll actually enjoy from home.
  • After childcare costs are deducted from my paycheck, I make less than $1,000 per month, which isn’t worth the stress on me, in my opinion.

Plan of Action, due before or by November 2020:

  • Budget:  Since finances are a concern for my husband, I decided to do a mock-up budget with just his income and no childcare.  We can afford for me to quit now, but I know my husband will not be comfortable with the margin.  So, I need to decrease a few expenses.  For example, we already contacted our internet service provider and got our bill reduced by about 50%, plus they gave us a $40 credit for the first month.  (I’ll have to do another mock-up budget after we start Baby Steps four and five…)
  • Finish Baby Step 3: three-month emergency fund of $10,000+; move it from savings account to a money market account ASAP.  Once this step is completed, we’ll have about $1,000 more per month in the budget.  That, alone, is enough for me to quit, but I want there to be absolutely no worries for my husband regarding retirement.
  • Start Baby Step 4: 15% of income to retirement.
  • Start Baby Step 5: kids’ college funds.
  • Side hustles:  Turn my blog from a hobby into a side hustle by learning how to be a successful blogger and applying the concepts to my blog.
  • Buy a house???  If so, on a 15-year fixed-rate conventional mortgage, where the monthly payment is less than $1,500 per month.

Homemaker Goals

  • The first week or two, I’d like to focus on establishing new routines based upon old ones that were successful when I was a stay-at-home mom before.
  • Help my husband find his passion, work that he’ll find fulfillment in.  I intend to do this by reading Ken Coleman’s The Proximity Principle with him and helping him to apply the concepts we learn.  We would like to move closer to my in-laws in the near future, so once we figure out work that he’s passionate about, we can look for jobs for him closer to them.
  • Continue side hustle.  Hopefully, by the time I quit, I’ll be earning an income from my blog.  I’ll need to put a lot more time and effort in, though.
  • Accomplish 2020 goals.  So far, I’m struggling with certain goals.  Once I quit, I should have absolutely no excuses preventing me from accomplishing them.

Hopefully, with this plan in place, I’ll be able to make my husband feel more comfortable with me quitting to be a stay-at-home/work-from-home mom and I’ll be able to feel content and fulfilled with my life once more.

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